Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Deep in Thought

I have a lot of things going through my mind and I wanted to post about them to see if I can get them out of my head...(please note it is kind of long and very hard for me)

Growing up I was the 5th out of 6 children. It was fun at times and frustrating at others.

The oldest sibling is just like my dad. He always wants to make sure you are where you are supposed to be and doing what you are supposed to do. I know he loves each of us and that's why he does it, however, it was hard to see that growing up and he got onto me a lot. But I always have and always will look up to him for guidance.

The next sibling was the "cool" sibling. He had the cool friend, played sports, was well liked, didn't get mad easily, was laid back, didn't tell me what to do. He's the one you always wanted to hang out with because he was so easy to get along with. I visited him a lot when I was in Idaho and he was in Utah. He's the brother that you want to be exactly like because he was so popular and cool. I love when he comes to visit because I get to spend time with him and though things in his life are stressful right now, I still want to hang out with him.

The next sibling was the "role model". I always wanted to be just like her. Skinny, cute, funny, she had a lot going for her. She got married and started a family before I was 16. I always wanted to know what she was doing. She was well liked and had boyfriends. I still want to be like her. She is an excellent mom and wife. I love going to visit her and hang out with her. I hate that she lives so far away (2 - 2 1/2 hours - that's a long way with a baby). I want to be with her all the time.

The next sibling and I never got along and still don't really. He's the one right above me and maybe it's because we are so close in age, I'm not sure. We never agree on anything and sometimes things he says drives me crazy. As we get older things have gotten better and we don't fight as often (only when we see each other... :) ). I hate that we have such a crappy relationship.

Then there is me...

Then the last sibling was my "little role model". When my older sister got married and moved away, I started looking "up" to my little sister. She had it all. Sports, Friends, well liked by all siblings, mom and dad, the grades, the personality. I ate lunch a lot with her and her friends because I didn't have anyone myself to sit with. We ended up marrying best friends and sometimes that works out to an advantage because when they want to hang out, we get to hang out. Yeah we fight when we are together a for a long time, but we make up fast and love each other. She has become my best friend next to Adam and although she may not know it, I missed her when she was at school and hate when she has to work and I don't get to talk to her.

You see...I was the outcast as you could say in school and at church I suppose. I mean I had friends growing up in class, but they weren't really friends. We never hung out on the weekends or did anything together. You know in the movies where there is the bigger girl that no one likes and everyone thought they were a nerd or something? That's how I felt growing up. I wasn't the biggest person in my class, but I have always been big. I could do something about it I know, but that's not the point I suppose I am getting to. I always felt like an outcast in my ward. During Primary (class for kids 3-12) the other kids would draw pictures on the board and they would draw all of them way skinny and then fat me. It was hard. For a long time I left church crying every Sunday. It was so hard for me.

If I got invited to parties, I felt it was to make fun of me not to include me and maybe they had different intentions, but that's how I felt.

When I turned 14, I met a great friend at a church (different ward from mine) dance and we hung out all the time. But where were the school friends? When I got to high school I became the Varsity Volleyball Trainer (or manager or water girl or whatever you choose to call it). It was fun for a while and I did it again my sophomore year. I went to games, practices, you name it, I was probably there. It was a lot of work and I didn't want to do it anymore. So I just quit. I didn't sign up for it again and didn't go to things at the end of the year.

Then my Junior year I joined Deca. It was a class that let me go to school half of the day and work the other half. This is when I got my first job at Park Avenue Cleaners - while I loved my co-workers, I hated the job. Touching people's nasty, smelly, dirty laundry is not my idea of fun. I met some great "friends" in Deca but then again we never really hung out. I did it again my senior year and became an officer that allowed me to go to DC for a few days with the other officers and our advisor for a conference. It was a lot of fun.

Then I went to BYU Idaho (well a while later) and had some of the greatest roommates. They were so friendly and I really felt that they were being sincere about us all being friends. We hung out together and they invited me to do things. I really enjoyed it. My third semester there, one of my friends from church went with me and was my roommate. It was fun, but I wasn't enjoying being there anymore. I got sick and spent many days and nights in my room crying. One particular roommate always helped me out. She would let me cry on her shoulder and was always there to cheer me up. Don't get me wrong, I liked all my roommates most of the time, but this one in particular was a life saver. She was my roommate the three semesters I was there.

I came home and started dating Adam and he became my life. I was either with him or at work.

This isn't a poor pitiful Kim blog, this is a blog to try to help me get this things off my chest. See getting ridiculed all those years by family and "friends" was hard. I still have some of those feelings bottled up inside. And though this blog has only helped a little bit, it has helped. There is a lot more I want to say, but can't seem to find the right words to say it.

So I suppose that's that in a nut shell.

Monday, June 15, 2009

Hoping, Dreaming, Wishing...

For another baby...YEAH RIGHT...NOT ANY TIME SOON!!!!

So my plan is to have our kids 2-3 years apart. Adam's plan is to have them 5-10 years apart. Although we are no where near ready to have another child, today I decided that I want my first one walking, potty trained and old enough to help out before we have another one. I watched a 3 year old for a friend of ours and had Parker for about 2 hours today. He helped out with Parker so much. He put the pacifier in his mouth in the car and played with him to keep him entertained. I loved it.

So...When/If we do have another kid we really want to name our next boy Gavin (we wanted to name Parker Gavin, but thought it was a little to popular - we both really like the name though) and if we have a girl her name will be Alexis. Adam has always liked the name Alixe (pronounced Allie - it's Russian I believe), but I knew that in school teachers wouldn't be able to pronounce it like that when they saw it. So we talked it over when we first got married and liked Alexi, Lexi, Alexis, and have decided that Alexis it is! Who knows in 2-10 years depending on who wins, we might change our mind. We shall see!!!

Think we are weird to discuss what we want to name are kids when we are first married?

What a random post I know...but I'm claiming them now publicly so no one can take them!!! :)

Friday, June 12, 2009

Too Busy...or Too Lazy???

To busy to blog lately because just this week:

-Got my hair highlighted and cut
-Took Grammer and Kari to lunch
-Our AC Broke
-Had to buy a new AC that Adam and Matt put in
-Did three loads of laundry for Adam and Me
-Two loads for Parker
-Parker's sheets twice
-Our sheets three times
-Visited Adam's family in Buna/Kirbyville

In between all of this stuff, I've been too lazy to post!

Before and After


After with color...
Adam restored this picture for the family, however, Marie or John will have to comment and let you know who this is etc.

Happy Birthday Meredith!

Hunter's Tball Game

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Pictures from Past 5 Days

Wednesday - Parker's first spoon feeding of Rice Cereal

Thursday - Chuck E Cheese

Check out that stack of Tickets.
Matt, Parker and Adam enjoying the game.
Intense conversation with Matt, Ryan, Parker and Adam

Saturday - Tball Game
Parker enjoying the game!
Isn't he cute?!?

Hunter is the short stop!
Hunter cheesin in the dugout!
Trying to watch the game.

Monday - Water Park
Hunter and Taylor
Tucker and Taylor
Hunter and Taylor
Aunt Squirt and Tucker
Aunt Squirt and Parker
Hunter and Taylor

The explanation of the events is in the post below! Sarah and Claire were with us at the water park, but I didn't know if she would let me post the pictures to my blog or not.

The Past 5 Days...

So Thursday evening, we had our traditional dinner at Chuck E Cheese. Matt and Kari came with us this time and it was a lot of fun. Their wings are very addicting. Then we headed over to Baskin Robbins for some ice cream. I had a Strawberry Banana Smoothie. It was so good. I think that's what I'll get from now on there.

Then Friday evening, we went over to the Johnson's house to hang with Maren and Ryan. Ryan cooked for us and it was so good. We were going to get in the pool, but Bishop had just shocked it. The six of us played Phase Ten instead. It was a lot of fun. I went from last place to second place by the time we ended the game.

Then Saturday, we had a busy day. We rode with Mom to Lufkin for Hunter's T-Ball game. He did so well. He got a home run and two triples! Then we rushed to the mall to see the movie UP in 3d. There were six adults (Caryn, Mom, Court, Janelle, Adam and Me), Three children (Hunter, Taylor and Tucker), and two babies - babies because we didn't have to pay for them (Meredith and Parker). We all loved the movie - at least I think all the adults did as well. Poor Tucker fell asleep because it had been a long morning. Taylor said the movie was amazing. Adam and I watched most of the movie in the isle with Parker. It was our first time to take him to a movie and I don't think I want to do it again until he is a little bit older. We brought Caryn's three kids home with us. We stopped at sonic on the way home because we were all starving. Adam and I had had a pop-tart and popcorn and that was it all day. Mom, Adam and I ordered the meal deal combo - you know the combo comes with a burger, fries, and a drink right? Well apparently this Sonic didn't know that because they only gave us the burger and drink. They told us they would send us out fries then the Manager came out and said he wouldn't charge us because we paid with a card etc. What do you mean you wont charge us? We said we wanted the combo, why would we order the combo and not want fries? Craziness. The kids spent the night with Mom and Parker, Adam and I headed home to sleep. When we got home, our AC was frozen. Adam spent the next hour trying to defrost it. With the use of lots of paper towels, a hair dryer, etc. he finally got it fixed. I was happy that he got it fixed. If he hadn't been home or hadn't been able to fix it, I would have been packing bags and we would be sleeping at Mom's as well. We were in bed after one and then our sweet precious son decided at 2:30 to wake up. He woke up again at 5:30.

So Sunday, I had to get up to help the kids get ready for church because Mom had a meeting - being the new Relief Society President and all (yeah I'm still kinda shocked about that one), so I was going on about 3-4 hours sleep. We got the kids dressed and ready and headed to church. Tucker sat with me most of Sacrament Meeting and I got Parker occasionally. Needless to say, I only heard bits and pieces of the talks. Then I spent most of Sunday School with Parker in the foyer or with Tucker trying to convince him to go with Aunt Squirt to Primary. For Relief Society, I was still trying to convince Tucker to go to Primary - of the two hours, I bet he only stayed a total of 20 minutes. Then we headed home and had lunch and we put the kids down for "quiet time" (the two older ones don't like naps apparently). I tried getting Parker to sleep, but he was so fussy and burning up. Needless to say, he spent the afternoon in a diaper and we gave him Tylenol every 4 hours. He was so fussy and wouldn't finish a bottle. Not like Parker at all. We finally got him to sleep and Taylor and Hunter came out because they didn't want to sleep. Adam turned on Happy Feet (cute movie) for them and we told them they had to be very quiet and not wake up Parker. They were mostly successful. Mom and Taylor went to Vidor to see Kev and Sarah that evening and Tucker wanted to go, but I wanted him to stay to play with me (selfish I know) so he stayed and we ate strawberries and made eggs, pancakes, and bacon for dinner and then played Uno. Hunter won the first round and then lost the second. He started to cry and I told him not to be sad that he lost. He should be happy because at least he had fun playing the game (or at least I hoped he had). He said that every time he loses it makes him think of his dog that died. (I tried so hard not to laugh in front of him...he comes up with crazy things like that all the time.)

Monday, Sarah came down and three adults (Sarah, Kari and Me) took five kids (Hunter, Taylor, Tucker, Claire, and Parker) to the water park. They had a lot of fun. Sarah and Kari took Parker around for a few minutes even. Then we headed home and between the 7 people that can eat real food, we downed 19 hot dogs. Please note that the adults had only two each. So between 4 kids, 14 hot dogs were eaten! Parker got so fussy. He was still burning up and still on the Tylenol every 4 hours. I was supposed to meet Caryn to bring the kids back, but knew I couldn't handle being in a car for two hours with a fussy baby. So Kari and Matt came to my rescue and took them for me. I finally got Parker to sleep about an hour, hour and a half tops and he woke up still fussy and not finishing a bottle. So I called the doctor and they wanted me to be there in twenty five minutes. I live a good 20 minutes from the doctor so it didn't give me much time to get Parker packed up and get on the road. Adam thankfully met us there, and we didn't get to see our normal pedi, we saw a different doctor that said nothing was wrong with him babies just like to fuss and want to be held. Are you kidding me? I was totally not happy with that. We went back to Moms and played the Wii for a while - Mom, Adam, Matt, and Kari all took turns entertaining Parker to give me a break and Matt and Adam went and got blizzards for us!!!

Today - Parker has spent most of the day asleep (catching up I suppose). He felt a little hot earlier and last night Mom said to keep giving him the Tylenol every 4 hours. He has finished or almost finished both bottles he has had today and has been asleep! I think he has been awake a total of an hour. I think that he just likes to be home and too much excitement for a few days is too hard on him.

If you made it reading this far, I am totally surprised. This is like a freaking journal entry!